Having a wee accident while having sex can and does happen – and worrying that it might can cause severe anxiety and put you off having sex at all. But there are ways to keep it on the to-do list!
How does it affect men?
Did you know that men have a natural mechanism that prevents urination while they have an erection?
When the penis is erect, the sphincter responsible for opening the bladder closes, making it extremely difficult to pass urine through the urethra.
There are, however, exceptions to this rule. For example, many men who have had prostate cancer and/or prostate surgery can experience incontinence during sex due to weakened nerves around the urethral sphincter.
How does it affect women?
Many women who experience bladder leakage will also leak when having sex. With an already weakened lower pelvic area, sex can aggravate and put pressure on the bladder to make leakage occur at the worst. Possible. TIME!
Further, when a woman orgasms, the bladder can spasm and turn that moment of amazement into ama-whatTheHELL!
So is my sex life over?
Here’s the good news. NO.
Even if you leak, you can still enjoy a healthy sex life. As long as you or your partner don't have a bacterial infection or an STD, urine leaves the body in a relatively sterile state, meaning there are generally no health risks associated with
bladder leakage during sex.
If you're feeling worried or embarrassed about leakage during sex, pluck up the courage to talk to your partner – chances are they will be far more understanding than you think – which could improve your intimate relationship in more ways than one.
How can I manage and prevent leaks during sex?
1. Take this as an opportunity to try new things. Some positions will make you leak more than others, and this will vary from couple to couple, but positions that are less likely to put pressure on a woman’s bladder include woman on top, from behind and side entry. Have a chat with your partner – and get experimenting! Plus, if you’re brave enough to venture away from the bedroom, the shower could be a viable option.
2. Prepare for intercourse. Yeah, we know this seems to take the spontaneity out of sex, but if it helps you enjoy the moment, is that such a bad thing? Try taking a bathroom visit before sex and avoiding liquids, especially coffee, alcohol and other diuretic drinks (which make you pee more) an hour before having sex.
3. Strengthen that pelvic floor. We’re big advocates of pelvic floor exercises as your first line of defense in strengthening the muscles that support bladder control. Do these regularly and you should notice improved bladder control across every area of life – intimacy included. Plus, strong pelvic floor muscles can lead to more intense orgasms. Incentive, anyone? For a step-by-step guide to pelvic floor exercises read our blog.
If you’re still worried about the way
incontinence is affecting your sex life
, talk to your doctor or medical professional. And most importantly, don’t let anyone – especially yourself – tell you you’re not still sexy. Finding a comfortable, convenient and attractive way to manage your day-to-day leaks can go a long way to boosting your confidence. Confitex
for men and women look and feel exactly like ordinary cloth underwear (we've even got a sexy lace style) so you can stop messing about with pads and shields and get on with life.